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Interestingly, the woman did not bring any marriage portion, and it was the groom who paid for the wedding presents, brought to the common lot his fortune of rice fields and cattle, and often had to pay money to the wife’s family.In return, his compensation was comparatively small: a tobacco jar, for example, a box for betel nuts, or a cigarette case.The uniformity of the mixture of various religious concepts in Vietnam—except among tribal peoples—tends to give a uniformity to marriage arrangements, ceremonies, feasts, dowry, etc.Because the individual is less important than the family, it is expected that the family will have a major voice in the selection of wives and husbands of their children.This is often done by a Buddhist monk who practices the art.[Source: The Religions of South Vietnam in Faith and Fact, US Navy, Bureau of Naval Personnel, Chaplains Division ,1967 ] Pamela La Borde, MD of Ethnomed wrote: "Marriage in Vietnam in the 1950s and earlier was very different than today and in the U. Previously marriage was influenced by Buddhist theology and Confucian philosophy.The family of the groom approves the marriage and organizes the wedding for him.
So, within a family you will see different last names.In the old days the bride was usually several years older than the groom.The reasoning went that an older woman was stronger and more able to perform farming chores.An ugly woman who could work was often considered a better catch than a beautiful one who couldn't work.
Men have traditionally married between 20 and 30 years of age, and women between 18 and 25 years.
Out-of-wedlock children are not generally approved; their birth is severely censored: in a family-centered society as Vietnam is, the place of such children is quite difficult.